Tag Archives: real life

Drown to Death

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Lift me up when you’re free
from underneath this pile of memories.
That’s where I refused to sink
but there, my life drowns to death.


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New Lessons

There is a thing about a college. I hate it. I always considered it as a place where I find myself very sad and irritated. But the last few days gave me a lot of new experiences to save into my memory jar. As I mentioned in an earlier post I have an urban study as part of my 9th semester architecture syllabus. We, my batch chose to study the city Alappuzha in Kerala, which is a beautiful city extended between two canals which is often called “Venice of the East”. It was fun to stay with my classmates and late night works were tiring. I am not here to explain about the whole trip. But I wish to share how these few days helped me to explore a part of myself that I never knew.

I tried to capture the best moments in my phone. I was so excited to know about the roots of a city. There were many things new to my knowledge. And we had to conduct a lot of surveys. I am usually a person who would love to sit in my room and read a book even if I wish to travel the world.  But during the study I was forced to do works assigned and it included a big list of things I never thought of doing myself. But results actually shocked me and the best part was the satisfaction and happiness I felt after everything. I was a bit confused to walk into the streets and ask questions to random strangers I met. I had a feeling that what if they do not cooperate. But my experiences were really good that people were happy to talk about them and they were very friendly too. I felt that world is not a bad place to live.

Within a few days I learned many things which I find very difficult to explain. I am happy to see a new part of myself. A talkative and inquisitive person who is very happy to talk to people and find new information, who is ready to hear the stories of people and who enjoys what he does. I think I love this new person. I really don’t like to say I am changing but I love to say that I am growing up. One thing about life is that we are forced to change by certain responsibilities. And we are never going to grow up if we stay afraid to step forward. I still believe that I have to explore a lot about this world and I have to learn more than what I find in books. For the coming days I am happy to be a person who would love to live in a book and to walk out and try to explore something new.


True Friend!

Dear Best friend,

When I look up to the sky, I see no darkness. I see a thousand bright stars. Sometimes I wished to be one of them. Because I wanted to look from the sky to see this earth in every possible way; to find you. The one I believe. The one I think who can understand me, who wouldn’t let me down, who will not desert me when I am lost…
But… Here I am… alone in a room, wishing if I was beside you. I waited a long time… I felt you are never going to come to me… Then I thought you are around and I am not realising it. I tried to find you in many. I trusted so many. But I fell… knowing that you are never there. You were the mystery and miracle of my life. You were just another word for me. You were the one I often found in the middle of a sentence.
Now I am old… and I realise that you were always that metaphor I found in my mirror…

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Slow-Success

Together we began the race.
They were stronger, they were faster.
They were ahead of me as I was slow.
Crowd clapped and ran along with them.
No one behind me when I looked back,
No one watched me run, nobody called my name;
On a lonely road I was running…
Afar I heard a roar: their touch on finish-line.
I screamed and cried… but I did not stop.
I ran and ran along the wind…
And I found a road beyond their dream! Continue reading Slow-Success

PAUSE

Today, there was a “pause” when I was sinking into a song in my headphone. It happens to me a lot recently. Something suddenly stops when my mind trying to ooze into a pleasure. Sometimes I see it as a  wake up call… To wake up from my dream… to see the real world; from my cosy memories to the busy  road I need to cross. There was a voice which told me that, somewhere inside my mind I built a castle and I am trying to hide into it. It said to me that I need to wake up… To hide my sorrows, to greet people on my path, to take a pen and to create a beautiful world… And… To fight an infinite battle to stay alive..!
This is not a stop… This is a “pause“. A “pause” which let me see what is real… And I love to call it… “INTROSPECTION“..!


 

Into The Rain

The summer had pierced through his heart
and heated every blood cells…
He could feel it.
Nothing felt cold.
His brain started to complain about it.
It said stories to haunt him,
coiled with each memory and turned to nightmares!

Today he wonder! 
Now it is cold…
Nothing is chattering
except the falling drops that wet his body… 
There is no nightmares, there is no heat.
Everything becomes cold and wet.
Slowly… A wide smile born on his lips…
and he merged into the rain..!


 

Out Of The Line

It is always fine to stand out of the line. This is the real story of my life like many of you. May be you can relate to yourself.


When I look back into my past, I can see a totally different person from what I am today. I always used to believe that I had some major mental problem. I was very shy to talk. I was afraid to walk with a crowd. I had crazy dreams and weird choices very different from people around me. I had a very limited friends because I used to believe that I am very different. I wanted to be a hero but, I chose to  hide in my insecurity…

I always knew that I was different and that deserted me in many situations. When all the other boys loved bikes and cars, I used to love books, art and craft. I used to stay silent than fighting back in a situation. I simply heard all the bullying with a broken heart but, I never complained. Continue reading Out Of The Line